In an effort to make more “Portly” customers feel good about purchasing a Hybrid GM has decided to introduce models that appear “weight impaired” like their “chubby” owners. GM has not disclosed what the name will be but has axed names like “Blubber-mobile” and”Fat-a-sourus” People from deep inside GM has confirmed the new car will be named “The Rosie O’Donnell”
Category Archive: Carlisle Johnny Hall Of Fame
May
21
GM To Introduce A Hybrid For “Chunky” People..
Apr
10
Mitsubishi Introduces The Worlds First “Pooch” Powered Hybrid..
Falling behind in the ever growing “Hybrid” market Mitsubishi has introduced the worlds first “K9″ powered Hybrid.Mitsubishi will provide you with a large supply of Alpo and Milk Bones to keep “Ole Yeller” happy. Mitsu also asks you use the glove box mounted “Pooper Scouper” and please clean up after your “Sccoby Doo” powered Hybrid when ever possible..
Apr
09
A Peerless Love Story or This Is Another Fine Mess I’ve Gotten Myself Into..
As the saying goes..”All good things come to those who wait” Well not too sure about all good but in my case a 1929 Peerless Model 6-81. For as long as my car soaked brain can recall parked in my hometown of Port Jefferson NY has been a very lonely 1929 Peerless. As some of you know in its day Peerless was one of the “Three P’s Of Motordom” in the 1920,s and 1930′s. Considered one of the best cars of its era. The other two P’s being Packard and Pierce Arrow. Some say the thing that killed Peerless was they made the cars too good. 
The average car in its day would last maybe 5 years. Peerless was known for going 10 years plus with no major repairs. Truth be told it was The Great Depression and Peerless lack of a lower priced model that sent it packing by late 1931. The story of this wonderful piece of automotive history is a two part love affair. It’s soon to be past owner is an amazing women who purchased the restored jewel over 18 years ago. From the start she had a love affair with the Peerless. Her intent was to use it for her costume company as a prop and for weekend drives with her husband. 
As time and life passed by the Peerless was parked and became part of the backdrop of our pretty harbor town. Still she refused to sell it hoping that one day it could be brought back to its past glory. Many people asked but she refused despite the price. As with most love affairs it is tough to let go. The second part of the love story is me. I have always had a desire and romance for cars from the 1920′s and 1930′s. Years ago when I spotted it parked it was love at first sight. For years me and the owner would talk. About life. About the Peerless. 
About her future plans for the Peerless. She was glad to know that I knew about the history of Peerless and its role in automotive history. Still no sale. She promised if she did sell it I would be the person she would sell it too. I had to promise to keep it close by and not sell the car for profit. I did. But I was running out of time. I needed to have a classic car ready for the Lincoln Highway 2013 tour. When I was at Spring Carlisle 2012 I fell for a fully restored 1936 Chevrolet Standard for a great price. Still it was not the Peerless. I called her son explaining I needed to know if she wanted to sell or not. If not than I would purchase the beautiful old Chevrolet. Few hours later the phone rang and she was ready to let her love go. Maybe she felt like I was cheating with another car or something in her life had changed. Sometimes its tough to let go. So now its a race to August 2013 to get the much loved Peerless ready for the Lincoln Highway Cross Country Tour. Unlike most love stories this one is going to have a happy ending. Oh well this is another fine mess I’ve gotten myself into.. ENJOY THE PEERLESS BEFORE SLIDE SHOW..
Apr
08
The Best Luxury Car Of All Time ..The Lincoln Continental Mark IV ..A 1970′s Chubby TV Detectives Favorite Ride
If you were a portly TV detective named Frank Cannon in the 1970′s you only drove one kind of car. A Lincoln Mark Series. Maybe you had no choice due to your large gullet or maybe you just wanted the best Personal Luxury Car money could buy. In 1971 When the Mark III was replaced by the longer and larger Mark IV. Mr Cannon followed suit and purchased a shiny new 71 Silver Mark IV to haul around his crime fighting blubber. All new for 1971 the Lincoln Continental Mark IV was indeed a rolling living room. Stuffed with either crushed velour or enough leather to make a cow cry. It was the typical American Luxury Car of the 1970′s. Huge engine, bad handling, horrible fuel mileage and a hood you could land a helicopter on. Lincoln stuck with the hidden headlights and tall Rolls Royce type grille that made the Mark III popular with TV detectives and pimps of the day. The roof was graced with an Opera Window. The lavish interior featured huge front seats with split armrests but the back seat was small and cave like. Powered by the whopping 460 V8 it was rated at 365 horsepower in 1971. 
By 1974 due to power robbing emissions restrictions your massive Mark IV could only put out 212 horsepower. Still they sold well till the last year 1976. By 1973 you could get a moon roof. Special Editions were made. With names like Givenchy, Bill Blass or Cartier you had one special road barge to cruise around in. 1974 would be the first year for the ugly 5mph bumpers front and rear. The Mark IV never made any excuses for its excess. The ride was pillow like and it cornered like a pound of soft butter. Options were few and everything was full power. 
Even the trunk could be opened with a glove box mounted button. Detective Cannon shouldn’t have to strain himself opening a trunk. Prices in 1971 started at $8640.00. By 1976 your basic Mark IV would cost you $11,060. What makes the Mark IV the Best Luxury Car Of All Time? Simply stated the word “No”. No road feel. No road noise. No way you can pass a gas station without stoping. No stress having to be bothered rooling up windows or moving seat. No apologies for being a huge floundering leather lined hulk of a luxury car with on other mission but to make you comfy, take up a large amount of space and gobble as much fuel as possible. For all those reasons the Lincoln Mark IV is the Best Luxury Car Of All Time.
Watch This 1973 Lincoln TV Commercial..How The Lincolns Ride sooooo Great
Apr
19
The Best Station Wagon Of All Time ..The 1971 Oldsmobile Custom Cruiser ..One Big Bahama Momma Of A Station Wagon
If you were a kid in the 1970′s you probaly have fond memories of sliding around a big vinyl bench seat as your Dad made a turn in a 19 foot long tank known as the American Station Wagon. My Mom could pilot her 1972 Buick Estate Wagon, puff a cig, tune the AM radio and smack me and my sister at the same time all. The big behemoth wagons of the 60′s and 70′s had great names like the Mercury Park Lane, Buick Estate, Oldsmobile Customer Cruiser and Ford Country Squire. 
Ford more than likely called it the “Country” Squire because it was the size of a small “Country”. By 1971 GM was selling alot of Mommy Movers. When they re-styled their large car platform the Station Wagons followed by being bigger and better. In the days of 35 cent gas driving a 6000lb War Wagon was a sign of a happy family. The grandest of these massive Station Wagons was the 1971 Oldsmobile Customer Cruiser. Kind of like a 98 Regency with fake wood on the side the Cruiser was a whopping 18 feet long. 
The only engine was the gas stations best friend the mighty 455 Rocket V8. With it’s front and rear bench seat, a rear facing back seat you could cram 8 rug rats and the family dog in it for a trip to Wally World. This Road Barge was about the open road. Handling was not an option but with 3 tons of mass it was like steering the Titanic. One groovy feature was the Clam Shell Tailgate. With just the twist of the key or dash button you could make the tailgate glide into the floor while the glass slid into the roof. Except for the Boattail Riviera perhaps the last cool thing GM did in the 1970′s. Never could understand how the same people that made the Clam Shell Tailgate made the uber bomb Chevy Citation. Oh sure you have some cool little wagons from Japan and Europe but a real station wagon should be the size of a Condo. That is why the best station wagon of all time is the 1971 Oldsmobile Custom Cruiser. With it’s stump pulling 455 Rocket V8 and two block long turning circle it leaves a carbon footprint bigger than the state of Idaho. So hail the Big Bahama Momma of Station Wagons.. The 1971 Oldsmobile Custom Cruiser.
Watch This Great Video Of A 1971 Oldsmobile Custom Cruiser and It’s Clam Shell “Glide-A-Way Tailgate
Apr
06
From The Great Depression To The Dawn Of War It’s 1930′s Week On Carlisle Johnny
The 1930′s was a crucial decade in history. As we said good buy to Prohibition we ushered in The Great Deprssion. In some people opinions Franklin D Roosevelt was our greatest president as his New Deal gave hope to a starving nation. FDR’s New Deal provided jobs that helped America expand. Roads were built. Bridges and Dams were built that changed the landscape forever. People were able to travel in perhaps the only possesion they had. Their automobile. The 1930′s was the era of some of the grandest classic’s of all time. the rise of Packard. The rise and fall of Pierce Arrow and Peerless. The V16 Cadillac. We said goodbye to many a car company and watched as GM became a powerhouse. The 1930′s was the very worst and the very best that the auto industry had to offer. Take a trip back to the 30′s with Carlisle Johnny and C.A.R.S.Classic Auto Appraisals to a simpler time. Using great old ads, trivia and photos from Great Depression icon Dorothea Lange we will show you the blight and delight of one of the grandest decades in automotive history.
Mar
30
Fire Up The IROC, Put In Your Bananarama Cassette And Blow Dry Your Mullet It’s 80′s Week
Did you ever own a Wham! cassette? Do you remember Reaganomics? Ever watch Star Search? Watch “Back To The Future” at the movie theatre? Eat Pop Rocks? Wanted to own an IROC? If you answer yes to any of these questions then your old and remember the 80′s. If you answered yes to the IROC question your old and mentaly insane. So take trip back with Carlisle Johnny to the 80′s. Before reality TV. Before Jon Bon Jovi wasn’t a member of AARP. The days when K-Cars and the Chevy Citation roamed the streets. Enjoy great auto trivia and some knarly videos all week on Carlisle Johnny and C.A.R.S. Classic Auto Appraisals 
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